Be Kind, Be Safe.

2020 is officially over. Hallelujah!!!  

Now, I know a lot of people are glad to see it go...good bye, see ya later, don't let the door hit you on the way out....and I do feel that as well. But, I am not positive 2021 will be any better. 

I am (overall) a hopeful person, I have hope that 2021 will bring us all (collectively) a better year...but I am also realistic and am not expecting any miracles. Would I love one? Of course...but I wouldn't even know where to start in trying to decide what miracle to wish for. 

We did learn a few valuable lessons in 2020 that I hope we can remember and use for 2021 and beyond. 

1. We are really not in control. For real. I know there are lots of experts and life coaches and such that say life is in your hands, you make life what you want it to be....and sure that sounds great, but when a global crisis (example: pandemic) hits....no amount of your own will can change how life is going. There are tons of situations that are just out of your (our?!?) control. We can control how we react to these unprecedented situations, but we cannot control how they affect us, our daily life and the lives of our family and friends. We can, however, try and control our reactions to these situations. Our attitudes mean everything when dealing with any situation (good or bad)....and trust me, I know it is not easy. It can be hard to find the good, when so much seems wrong. 

But for 2021, we can expect the unexpected and prepare for it. We can be ready for whatever 2021 throws our way (even if we have no idea what that will be). And a mantra that has rung over and over in 2020....we can move it forward to 2021. Be Kind, Be Safe. 

2. Stress can be present, even when we don't feel it. Stress can do crazy (seemingly) unrelated things to our bodies. Our whole body is connected, from the top of our heads to the tip of our toes....we are one body, with our soul and mind. So, it stands to reason, if our soul or mind have unrest...it may leak out into our physical self in a negative way. 

There will always be stress, that is a part of life, a part of living....but there are ways to reduce how it affects us. Being kind, being safe sure does help...hahaha but so does doing things you enjoy. Hobbies, projects, meditating...whatever helps you keep the stress levels from being too overwhelming. Everyone is different when it comes to what helps. Do whatever YOU (not your neighbour or your spouse or your kids or any celebrity....) need to do to calm your body, soul and mind. 

Of course, if you have a family/spouse, you will have to work together to make new habits work for your situation (for example: I cannot decide to just read 12 hours a day...I still have responsibilities....hahaha) but I know I can snag a few minutes here and there to help decompress my stress. Find what works for you....and do it. 

3. Honestly this is the one some of us need to hear the most. Sometimes it is ok to just give up, for a little. I stopped trying to hold it all together, I stopped trying to figure it all out...I gave up, let go and just let life happen. (I guess this kinda goes back to #1 about control...or lack there of)....it was what was needed, I just could not continue the way I was going, so I stopped....and when I felt able, the will/desire to get back to it (whatever it happened to be...) I did. Maybe experts will say this advice is wrong and maybe no one else will understand...but it worked for me and I will use this strategy again going forward. It is not ideal, and not something I choose lightly but sometimes all you need is a break from even thinking. 

I am a pretty easy going individual, but I found reprieve at times by just letting go even further and coasting along....letting others make decisions and just following. 

I guess that is the lesson for this one...sometimes it is ok to just go with the flow. I have a way I like my days to go...but if they cannot or do not, I can just relax and let the day play out. I can (and do at times) play an active role and force my agenda to work....but when doing so creates more tension and stress for me...I find it is better to take a step back and just go with it. lol 

I am not really here to give advice for how to live in 2021. I just want everyone to know that it can (and will) look different for everyone. The biggest thing is to make whatever you need to do, work for you in your situation. 

I, for one, have not made New Years resolutions in many years. Doing them stresses me out. I also went through years of choosing 1 word for the year. I enjoyed these, it helped me focus and gave meaning and purpose to my year. But alas, this year I am not even up for that. This year I don't vow to learn something new (but I know chances are I will) but my desire is to re-visit things I already know how to do, and to actually take the time to practice them. Doing things you already know will reduce your overall stress. (They say in times of great stress, you should watch shows/movies, read books that you already have seen/read....it helps by not causing your mind to try and guess what is going to happen next. It just lets you enjoy without added stress.) 

So, while I am hopeful for the year. I am not going to put added stress on myself to make this the best year yet....if we all make it through....being kind and being safe....that is enough for me. 

Goodbye and good riddens 2020.....Welcome 2021, please be kind to us. :)